


Great Brother, Lousy Beta

by sdwbf



Category: Supernatural
Genre: Alpha/Beta/Omega Dynamics, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2012-10-28
Updated: 2012-10-28
Packaged: 2017-11-17 05:44:46
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,110
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/548244
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/sdwbf/pseuds/sdwbf
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Dean and Sam finally get together, but after one incredible night of sex, Dean refuses to let Sam knot him again and it's making them both miserable. Written for <a>this prompt</a> on the Blindfold_spn meme.</p><p>Posted to Live Journal Feb. 3, 2012</p>
            </blockquote>





	Great Brother, Lousy Beta

**Author's Note:**

> Per the prompt I used 'beta' for what I've gotten into the habit of calling 'omega' in other recent stories.
> 
> To cut down on exposition, this assumes that 'canon' involved Mary being killed by a demon for kicks, not part of a long-term (sheesh) plan. Assume said demon was dealt with before Sam left for college and we're done with that!

  
**Great Brother, Lousy Beta** by sdwbf

Dean had never really understood what it meant to be a beta. Why would he? Life in the guise of a yellow-eyed demon had taken his mother before she could teach him, and that same event had led to him modeling his behavior after his remaining parent – a very alpha John Winchester. Every once in a while he thought maybe he overdid it and Sam did have a tendency to mutter about over-compensation, but what did his rotten baby brother know? Bitch was an alpha and didn't have to worry about someone thinking he was soft because he didn't have a stupid knot on his dick.

Anyway, Dean knew being a beta meant he hadn't popped that stupid knot when he'd hit puberty and he'd high-tailed it to a clinic for a birth control shot about five seconds later, because he knew what else it meant along the 'who did or didn't give birth' lines (always made his head hurt trying to figure out how it worked with a female alpha and a beta male, but he wasn't hard-wired to want a female, so he had no practical experience with the gymnastics involved.) But yeah, that was about it. Sure he'd heard the touchy feely bullshit about how he cried more easily (okay, he did, he was a freaking crier, but so were some alphas!) and was more nurturing which was a total stereotype because yeah, he took care of his little brother, but he would have stepped up and done that even if he was an alpha. And so on and so on. So he'd dismissed all the emotional stuff as chick-flick nonsense and concentrated on the biology of it all.

Liked he'd said, he didn't crave female companionship. He liked big, strong alphas who could give him a run for his money in the physical stakes. He indulged that like whenever possible, the rougher the better because he loved, loved, loved being manhandled, but he drew the line at knotting. Just couldn't risk being that helpless for that long with a stranger who might turn out to be a shapeshifter or possessed or a witch or etc. etc. He should have been able to take that very necessary precaution -- as in his dad had set him down and made that the basis of their version of The Talk and God that was freaking embarrassing – and figured out maybe the chick-flick shit had a point, but no, he'd been too busy 'over-compensating' and living in a freaking land of denial.

Might have gone on like that for years, except he decided to go see Sam graduate from Stanford. Undergrad. Kid already had his shiny acceptance letter/scholarship for Stanford Law, and yeah, just what the world needed – another freaking lawyer – but he'd always tried to support his little brother even when he was being a clueless jerk about what was important.

Dean felt nervous about going. Between one thing and another – major hunts, Sam going on vacations with college buddies, or maybe the less than subtle vibe from baby brother that Dean didn't fit in with Plan Normal Life – they hadn't actually seen each other since Sam had hopped a bus to California for his freshman year. But they'd talked on the phone at least once every few weeks, and 'Mr. Normal' or not, Sam had always insisted Dean text him every night to say he was okay, then 'rewarded' Dean for doing so with a text of his own.

Dad decided not to come along. Not surprising. Two alphas under one pre-college roof – even if that 'roof' was over a long string of crappy hotel rooms and day-to-day lease apartments – hadn't worked well. Sure John Winchester loved both his sons and they loved him, but Dad and Sam had also clashed all the freaking time. Had driven Dean nuts trying to keep the peace, and it had almost been a relief to see Sam head for Palo Alto. Damned freaking alphas. He knew things would calm down between the two knotheads once Sam found a mate, but there had been a couple of times when he'd worried things might come to blows. So, yeah, he was all for Dad not going because things could get tense fast and neither Dad nor Dean wanted Sammy's big day ruined. Dad was equally in agreement that Dean _had_ to go for the same reason.

Dealing with a murderous vengeful-spirit slowed Dean down and he reached Palo Alto less than thirty minutes before the ceremony was due to start. Had to sit way in the back, but he texted Sam _I'm here_ about five seconds before the procession started. Easy to pick Sasquatch out of the line of caps and gowns making their way in and he was grinning. So he'd either gotten the text and was happy about that or hadn't and didn't care. Dean forced himself not to think too hard about which and settled in for mind-numbing boredom, because, yeah, graduation ceremony. Snore. The things he did for his brother.

It was every bit as tedious as he'd thought it would be, but he couldn't help grinning when the caps went flying in the air. Hard not to be proud of him even if he thought the world needed Sam hunting far more than it needed him here. Kid had wanted this though, and he'd done it. So, yeah, Dean was proud of him.

His phone buzzed seconds after the recessional ended. _Meet me at my place in 60._ Surprised Dean. GraduateSam didn't seem to come with a big brother accessory, so he'd figured he'd have to stick around a few days before Sam stopped celebrating enough to maybe have a cup of coffee with him. Made him feel all warm inside to think Sammy would ditch the parties for him, but by the time he pulled up in front of Sam's apartment he was reconsidering. Maybe Sam had thought the text had been a lie and wanted proof he'd come before ditching his ass. Alphas could be like that. Seriously if they weren't such cute babies, no one would let them live, because, damn they were annoying.

Far from certain of the welcome he'd received, Dean trudged up the stairs to the correct apartment. He raised his hand to knock, but the door was thrown open and arms twenty miles long yanked him up against a brick wall while they tried to squeeze the life out of him. Stupid Sasquatch, but he couldn't help smiling against Sam's shoulder.

"Missed you." His brother's words were a warm puff of breath against the top of his head. At six feet tall not many alphas could make Dean feel almost petit, but Sam had towered over him since the kid's junior year of high school and now his muscle mass had caught up with the frame. "So damned much."

"Missed you, too." Not much into sentimental words, but he figured the end of a four-year separation was a special occasion.

The arms tightened enough to make him squeak if he did that sort of thing, which he so didn't. "How much?"

Huh? What did he want? A number on a scale from 1 to 10? Did Sam not get who he was pawing? Speaking of which, wasn't it time to let go? He opened his mouth to put words behind all those very reasonable questions, but Sam shifted his hold to one arm, then used the freed hand to cup the side of Dean's face and tilt his head back so he could look into Sam's eyes. They were full of love, but there was a shitload of want in them, too. Oh. His little brother wanted to mate him. Thought it with the same inner calm as he might think why, yes, he would have another beer. On the other hand, "Seriously?"

The hand on his lower back shifted downward to rest on the swell of his ass. "Wanted you forever," Sam assured him, then pressed his lips to Dean's.

It wasn't some sort of magical kiss that made Dean suddenly fall in love with him. Couldn't do that since Sam had always been everything to Dean so it wasn't remotely possible for him to love him any more than he already did. But it was the sexiest damned kiss Dean had ever had, and by the time it finished his hole was dripping and twitching with the need to be filled. "Then take me," he gasped when their lips parted.

Sam's other hand dropped to lift Dean up and he wrapped his legs around his brother's waist, then hung on as Sam carried him to the bedroom. Took Sammy's big hands a minute to get them both stripped down and Dean started to get nervous. He'd never made love, had never let a knot breech his body and what if –

Sam's weight settled on top of him, his lips recaptured Dean's and he pretty much lost his train of thought. Hands caressed him, lips nuzzled him while the biggest damned cock he'd ever seen or felt impaled him. Never felt so good, turned him into a mewling, writhing mess, his hole so wet it was a wonder Sam could stay inside.

The press of the knot didn't register at first. Felt that much before, his body automatically tightening to warn the knothead fucking him to back off before things got too intimate for both of them. Except Sam wasn't some random knothead he'd picked up for kicks.

He ran those big hands along Dean's flanks, making soothing noises. "Easy, let me in, baby," he all but cooed.

Dean wanted to punch him on principle, but his body responded to its chosen mate's voice, and with a quick twisting thrust, Sam's knot pushed inside. Dean cried out at the burn, his body arching up against Sam's at the pure bliss it caused. Never felt so full. Made him come over and over again, his ass milking the knot for every drop of seed and marking scent. God, the scent. Every alpha who got within twenty feet of him would know he belonged to Sam. Thought made him come yet again while hot fluid painted his insides with 'property of Sam Winchester.'

Could have died a happy man in that moment. Or even the next three times Sam hardened and fucked them to paradise, but slowly things grew less physically intense and settled into long, slow bouts of love making. Through it all Sam never softened enough for his knot to come free, but the length of time before he could fuck Dean again grew longer. And in those quiet times Sam wanted to talk.

Soft words of love, even adoration about how wonderful, how beautiful Dean was. Ones of hope about the long life together they'd have which absolutely did include hunting just as soon as they got Sam's stuff packed up. About the kids that would grow in Dean's belly one day while they did research and support for other hunters. So many dreams. So much love. All of it would have overwhelmed someone like him who had spent his entire life avoiding even the thoughts let alone putting them into words. But oh, so much worse was the way his body betrayed him.

Dean had always been the strong one, the protector, but now every muscle yielded to his mate, and he found himself clinging to Sam like one of those stupid betas in the chick-flicks. How many times had he rolled his eyes as the hero defended his mate while some obnoxiously petite beta clung to him. Hell, he'd even seen a few pornos where the knotted hero fought a sword duel. Stupid, yet if something burst into the room, he knew what part he'd be forced to play. Unnerved him to be so helpless, so reliant on someone else.

Toward the end, he'd started trembling, struggling against the conflicting impulses to find some way to escape and the need to keep Sam inside of him forever. "You okay, sweetheart?" Sam murmured, all comforting and caring.

Made Dean tear up and that was so it. "I'm fine!" he snapped. "Be even better if you'd shut the fuck up!" Not the most glorious end to a mating. Especially since all they could do was lie there in each other's arms for the twenty agonizing minutes before Sam _finally_ deflated and pulled out.

*

A few days after his second birthday, Sam told his father that he was going to marry Dean when he grew up. Dad had scooped him up and told him it was possible, but it was an alpha's job to take care of a beta and part of that was not telling them such things until they were ready to hear it.

Worried he'd accidently hurt his Dean, he'd agreed to swear he wouldn't ask him to be his mate until Dad said it was okay. Bastard had turned it into a blood oath Sam was incapable of breaking. When he grew up he understood why Dad had done it – Dean's whole universe revolved around Sam, and unless he felt something would harm his little brother, Dean completely lacked the ability to tell him no. And while it wasn't abnormal for an alpha to mate a beta sibling – they could even legally marry – it was a parent's job to make certain the beta's consent was freely given.

So, yes, Sam understood, but he'd also hated his father for it every time Dean went off for a quick fuck with some knothead who hadn't a clue how wonderful his brother was. He'd even begged Dad to release him from his vow when it was time to leave for Stanford. Hadn't wanted to go without Dean, but Dad had refused, had said the best thing for both Sam and Dean was to go alone. "Give him time to be Dean instead of your brother, Sam."

Had nearly killed Sam to give Dean a brotherly hug goodbye, the pleas for him to come with Sam burning on his tongue, but the damned spell kept them unspoken. Four years of hell had followed. Yes, he loved a lot of things about Stanford not the least of which was a place to live for the entire time complete with friendships that lasted for years instead of days. But he'd also spent the time agonizing some other alpha would turn Dean's pretty head and claim what Sam had always known was his. Yet, he'd also found the wisdom to know he had to risk it, had to do what Dad had said and let Dean be Dean. Had even ended up conspiring with Dad to keep Dean away and had forced himself to get by on phone calls and text messages.

Sam had even prepared for the worst – a life without Dean – and had applied for law school since he knew he'd never be able to survive hunting alongside his brother if that's all Dean ever was to him. But a week before his graduation Dad had called to give him back the life he knew he wanted. "He's on his way there," he'd said. "It's time to claim him, Sam."

He'd heard a soft pop in his mind as the blood oath had ended. "He can say yes, then?" Or no, but he hadn't been able to even voice the thought.

Dad had sighed. "Since the day you were born he's been yours. We just gave him the time to never have to doubt that."

Even with Dad's reassurances, Sam had worried until he had Dean in his arms. Amazed him how easy it had been, how easily Dean had accepted the idea, how easily his body had taken him in. Or at least it had been at first.

Sam had been flying so high on endorphins it had taken him too long to realize his mate was trembling with something other than pleasure. Shaking, snapped words of denial about anything being wrong – all were unmistakable signs of Dean in pain. He hadn't understood why, but a horrible suspicion raised its head the next morning when Dean had refused to take his knot again. As he had the next two times they'd made love. Dean never fought that, even initiated it, but he baulked at knotting. Sam hadn't even asked a third time. He'd merely accepted the truth – his knot was so damned big it had hurt Dean. More than one doctor had warned him not every beta would be able to handle a knot that size, but he'd never dreamed someone as solid and tall as Dean would have a problem. Stupid assumption, but no way he'd ever risk doing that to his mate again.

Instead he made do with making love to him like another alpha would use him for sex. Hurt something inside Sam every single time, but it made Dean happy and that was what mattered. Told himself that over and over again even when the scent of their first mating faded and Dean smelled like an unattached beta.

Too beautiful for words, Dean had always attracted other alphas and they began approaching him again. At first Sam had snarled at them to force them to back off, but he'd given up and left the rejections to Dean after he'd caught one alpha after another laughing at Sam behind his back like he was some beta-whipped loser too dumb to know the pretty beta was using him while waiting for his real mate to come along and claim him. Not exactly the married life he'd dreamed of.

*

Dean didn't know how to deal with his betaness, but he'd always known how to take care of his baby brother. Made him real sensitive to Sammy's moods and despite his best efforts not to notice, he finally had to admit that Sam was depressed. Not hard to figure out why given the funks always ran deeper right after some knothead put the moves on Dean. Which meant he was not only going to have to find a way to get over his beta-issues so Sam could keep him properly knotted and marked, but he was going to have to explain himself. Fuck. He'd rather take on a Wendigo with his bare hands.

Before he could man up and deal, things came to a head when they chose the wrong bar for a post-hunt beer. When Sam had gone to the rest room, three knotheads had strutted over to their table and had announced they could give him what 'the boy' couldn't. They hadn't taken Dean's 'fuck off' well. No problem, but he'd never forget the stricken look on Sam's face when he came out of the men's room to see Dean standing there with swollen knuckles and three unconscious jerks at his feet.

His mate had turned on his heel and walked out, leaving Dean to hurry after him. Damn, he'd screwed this up. His scent should have told those assholes to buzz off while he indulged in little PDAs with his Sammy. Instead he'd been treated his freaking alpha like his little brother and had let every alpha they encountered believe he was available so he'd had to use his fists to give them the message. Sure those guys should have taken no for an answer, but they'd come off as drunken morons, not the kind of utter lowlife who went for mated betas. So it hadn't been fair to them either. God, he was such a loser.

Sam was sitting on the end of their bed with his head in his hands when Dean got to the room, and fuck. Just … fuck. He dropped to his knees in front of him and fought for the words that would make this better. "Sammy? You okay?"

And how lame could he get? Obviously Sam wasn't, but he was also an alpha and couldn't help but respond to the distress in Dean's voice. "Just have a headache. Don't worry about it," he answered with what he probably hoped was a reassuring smile, but it was jarringly pathetic. As was the way his voice cut off like he was biting back some sort of endearment before it could spill out.

God damnit, he'd even denied Sam the pleasure of calling him 'baby' or 'sweetheart' or 'snugglemuffin' or something else appallingly sappy. "I'm such a lousy beta," he whispered, devastated at the sudden realization of how much he'd rejected his alpha's every need. And Sammy loved him enough he'd simply taken it when he should have been kicking Dean's moronic ass.

"What? No!" Sam insisted, pulling him up into his arms and no. Just no. Dean didn't deserve to be comforted, except he couldn't stop himself from curling up against him. And that was how he was getting all of this wrong, wasn't it? He kept fighting everything his body wanted because he couldn't get over himself long enough to _be_ himself.

He was Dean freaking Winchester. He could handle three muscle-bound knotheads without raising a sweat. And he could be strong enough to be vulnerable with his mate. "No, I suck," he insisted, "and you could do a hell of a lot better, but since you're stuck with me, you should knot me."

Sam's arms tightened around him. "No, I won't hurt you."

Hurt him? … Oh. No wonder Sam had been so patient. He'd thought this was all some physical problem. "Doesn't hurt me, but …" Damn, he didn't want to admit it, but after what he'd put Sam through, he had to. "Scares me."

"Why?" Sam paled. "Do you think I can't take care of you?"

"No! I'm afraid of how much I want you to!" He sighed. "Like I said, I suck." He cupped Sam's face. "But I love you. With everything I am, I love you and I'm so tired of hurting us by fighting what we both need."

"That's the first time you've said it," Sam murmured, turning his head to kiss his palm.

He flushed, embarrassed. "Always going to suck with words, Sammy, but take me to bed and I'll shout it with my body."

Sam nodded and they shed their clothes before settling back on the bed together. Same glorious slide of skin to skin they'd danced every night since Sam had claimed him, but this time Dean forced himself to relax when the knot pushed against his hole. He moaned as it breeched him, his arms and legs tightening around his mate to hold him as close as possible. Their bodies soared together and this time when they floated back to Earth he let Sam comfort him with soft words and touches instead of fighting him while he freaked out. Found it was that easy – stay focused on Sam instead of what it all did or didn't mean and it was kind of nauseatingly beautiful.

He even whimpered with loss when Sam eased out of him. Sam soothed him with a kiss. "Love you."

Again the final word was bit off and Dean scowled. "Baby."

"What?"

"Or is it sweetheart?"

"Are you all right?"

"You want to call me something. What is it? And it better not be snugglebunny."

Sam laughed, pulling him close so Dean did indeed snuggle up against him. "Last one sort of fits."

"I'll fucking kill you," he promised not really meaning it. Figured he'd put Sam through enough he'd earned the right to call him whatever he wanted.

"Might be worth it," he answered, then the bitch went to sleep, leaving Dean to worry about it.

*

The next morning they hit the local diner before leaving town. The waitress led them to a booth in the back while Dean bitched about the pathetic shower in their former room. Kept right on talking as he slid onto the bench beside Sam instead of on the opposite side, then poked at him like Sam was an idiot when he was too stunned to immediately put his arm around Dean's shoulders.

The waitress gave them an indulgent smile as he got Dean settled against his side. "Newlyweds?"

"More like a second honeymoon," Dean answered as she poured them both coffee.

They ordered pancakes and once they were alone, Sam nosed Dean's temple and drew in a deep breath. "Mmm, you smell like mine."

"Can't imagine why. You only knotted me four times before dawn." He smiled up at Sam, then gave him a kiss. "Love you, Sammy."

"Love you, too." And wait for it. "Gorgeous."

Dean gave him a considering look, then smirked. "I like it."

end


End file.
